“There is a road, no simple highway
Between the dawn and the dark of night
And if you go no one may follow
That path is for your steps alone
Ripple in still water
When there is no pebble tossed
Nor wind to blow…” Jerry Garcia
I’ve made some waves in my time. I
have also been caught in the riptide they created. All in all, I have very few
regrets. This is no valedictory, and I don’t assume I have peaked. Some
situations and subjects are simply too tempting for me not to blurt out a
contradictory opinion just for the sake of sparking a spirited discussion.
My life goal, however, is to
create ripples rather than waves. What’s the difference, ripples are just
little waves, right? In a sense, that’s true. Besides size, I see the cause as
a difference between the two. The Dead’s song about a ripple not caused by
tossed stones or blowing wind strikes a chord with me.
What if each moment of life sends
out a ripple through time and space within the universe and the sum of those
ripples is the creation of our eternal existence? Of course, that idea (unlike
those of the pure energy religions) presupposes a mathematician standing, above
and independent of, time, space, and the multiverse. One who knows when things
don’t add up and when they do.
I generally begin each day with a
request for divine direction. If I stop and review those requests, I find each
one has been answered in a positive manner. That does not mean I took the
advice, or I didn’t try doing it my own way first, or that I even heard it, but
I have not gone without direction. It means that the ripples I make are, in
fact, of my own making. The consequences of those ripples and any possible
correction of them rests upon my shoulders.
If my soul is scarred, the wounds
were all self-inflicted. The pain I may have felt, however, has engendered
divine empathy that affected mercy on my behalf. I believe that I have been
granted a peek into my life beyond this body that I now inhabit. That I don’t
charge off towards it shows I may have developed some patience after all. No
one is more surprised by that epiphany than I am.
I have passed up some very
tempting opportunities to make waves lately. To say I’m learning, I’m improving,
or I’m more desirous of peace is premature. Let’s just say I am more prepared
to watch people go over the falls than to warn them it exists. If they will not
hear the roar of falling water, see the rushing surface, or feel the
acceleration of the current, do they really need my voice?
I say that and then, each Sunday,
don my crusader outfit. It doesn’t make me a hypocrite, just a fool. As the
song said, it’s not a simple highway and the path is a solitary one.
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